WALTER MATHAU’S HAT *

Now I have this ratty, worn, ancient NY Mets hat

that I practically live in around the house.

Would wager I have done everything a man can do in it.

Sometimes I forget it’s even on my head and wear it out in public.

So I’m in the local Save-a-Lot yesterday morning over in the meat section.

Looking over the turkey parts and out of the corner of my eye I notice this

Guy in a crisp impeccable pristine Yankees cap over near the chicken livers

Shaking his head and smirking at me with a bemused condescending vibe.

So I saunter down to the pork chops and keep shooting him looks until

He has to directly acknowledge me and he says in a snide sarcastic tone-

So … you’re a Mets fan

I deadpan him with this innocent pokerface and reply matter of factly …

O you mean this hat? Nah I’m a Walter Matthau fan – You know that movie

From 68 called the Odd Couple? Well he appears in a number of scenes with

This very Mets hat. I got this on E-bay years ago – cheap – surprisingly they

Say it’s worth quite a lot of money now.

Of course now dude in the Yankees cap

seems interested and rather impressed.

You could see the dollar signs lighting up his eyes.

And he goes … really?

Sure been thinking about putting it back up for a bid soon –

should pay for my daughter’s tuition

At college for a couple of semesters …

Abruptly ending the conversation …

Tipping my hat to him walking away

Mumbling under my breath. So who’s on first You Dipshit …