What baseball needs
is a doctor who attended
Cartoon Medical School.
No more Disabled List
or Tommy John Surgery.
Players can be splatted
squished into a ball
flattened by a piano
squashed by an anvil
blown into pieces
hammered into the ground.
They can fall off a cliff
swallow a firecracker
have a big hole
in the stomach
water spewing
out of where they’re
stuck with needles –
and the next scene
they are fine.
Baseball also needs the
Cartoon Hospital of Recovery.
Obviously, it is an
outpatient clinic.