OFF TO AFGHANISTAN

You don’t need any of that fancy leather oil
Vaseline works just as good for rubbing down your glove
Use superglue to cover a blister
A sharpened belt buckle can nick a ball
A right handed pitcher will lift his back foot
Before throwing to first
The catcher’s equipment is called
The tools of ignorance
An easy fly ball is a can of corn
A hard line drive is a blue darter
A hit ball off your chin is a barking dog
A bowtie pitch is a high fast ball
Right by the Adam’s Apple
Never swing when it is 3 and 0
Satchel Page was right
Home Plate never moves
The best baseball nickname Is Oil Can Boyd
The best rivalry in sports
Is the Yankees and the Red Sox
The best baseball movie is not
Fields of Dreams, it is Bang the Drum Slowly
And always remember
“There is no crying in baseball”
I gotta go now son
Listen to your mother
I love you