IF GOD WERE PITCHING

Would He start off
with a splitter?
Hit the corners
with a fastball?
Does He resort to a spitter?
Throw at your head?
I doubt He needs steroids,
but does believe
in brushing you back.
Gives up few walks –
have to earn your way on.
Does He taunt you with singles
because He loves crashing hopes
with double plays?
What would be His nickname?
The Big Guy?
The Intimidator?
Can you imagine giving signs to God?
What do you do if
He shakes you off?
Who would be God’s designated hitter?
Does He shower in holy water
after games?
Jesus – is He waiting in the bullpen?