I coulda been a sportswriter,
handling all sports with clichés and aplomb.
I coulda followed all the athletes,
and caught their monosyllables
with my little tape recorder.
“How’d you pitch today?”
“I felt my fastball was working.”
“But you got knocked out in the 3rd.”
“Can’t win ‘em all. Tomorrow is another day.”
I coulda been a sportswriter,
with a minor in business.
“So, what do you think of your contract negotiations?”
“I ain’t gettin’ enough.”
“They’re offering you 4 million over 5 years.”
“I’m worth more than that.”
Instead I traded my typewriter for chalk,
and fielded questions like:
“Who wrote ‘The Diary of Anne Frank’?”
“Is the opposite of ‘dilate’ dying early?”
I coulda been many things,
but chose, as it turns out,
the road most traveled by.