EXTRA INNINGS – A MODEST PROPOSAL

Baseball, most certainly, lacks the speed of
basketball, football, hockey,
or any other major sport.
It remains true to its pastoral roots
with only twenty-two minutes of
ball-in-flight in a four-hour game.
Having emerged sleep-deprived
from a late, extra-inning game,
I offer the following proposal:
If, after nine innings the score is tied,
each team selects one batter and
whoever does better –
a hit trumps a strikeout,
a walk beats a groundball out –
that team is declared the winner.
If, let’s say, both players strike out,
the next hitter in the lineup
comes up to bat.
The home team always has last licks.
Purists may raise objections
to my baseball sudden death,
but frankly, I need my sleep!