A basketball is bloated, swollen so much that
It takes a giant hand with spike-like fingers
To grasp and hold it from the top.
A football was seemingly designed by someone
Inebriated and cursed with oblong vision so that,
When bouncing, it never takes the same
Predictable, reliable path twice in a row. (The same
Could be said for the rugby ball but it rarely finds
Itself hitting the ground on purpose, so there’s
No need to be concerned about unpredictable
Bounces.) Now, back to the football. It’s difficult
To accept that the football and the basketball have
Any DNA in common. Each might be the culmination
Of an operation carried out in a dungeon lab by a
Mad scientist named Frankenstein. And talk about
Being too tightly wound, a golf ball is so small and
Round that it explodes when hit at the start and
Takes off soaring to a distance counted in tentative
Terms of yards, but it finishes its interval journey
Tapped to go some feet or even inches. The golf
Ball is the nervous wreck of its rotund family,
Whereas the volleyball longs for the family touch,
Takes comfort in being sent from ‘mate to ‘mate
Only to be spiked and slammed at each segment’s
End. Oh, brother, then there is the bowling ball! No
Ball should be so heavy that it makes a rumbling
Sound when it rolls – – – and let’s not even broach
The need for any ball to have holes drilled into it
So that human fingers can be put inside So gross!
Ping pong balls have a funny sissy name and are
Mostly air . . . and must get very dizzy from being hit
Much like a tennis ball, back and forth. At least,
The tennis ball has some color and fuzz . . . but
It’s cardboard construction and air filling show a weak
Character. Then there are the much too social pool
Balls, the ones who need each other to be sporty.
Finally, there is perfection. Not too big nor too small,
Not too hard nor too soft, not too light nor too heavy
– – – just right, as Goldilocks might declare – – –
A baseball is a work of art. It’s smooth but can be
Roughed up, bounces true and fits not like but right
Into a glove, can be on purpose thrown to curve,
Float like a butterfly or go straight . . . or even drop!
If God were to create a ball for sport, a baseball it
Would be . . . and that would indeed be poetic justice:
The king of sports should have the king of balls!
THE POETRY OF THE GAME