I’ve attended many games;
I can list so many names
Of players on so many days
Who won or lost in many ways.
I’ve seen my share of pitchers winning
And comebacks in the final inning.
I’ve eaten hot dogs and drunk beers,
Admired stars who had no fears,
Seen pitchers throw at scary speeds
And fielders pull off startling deeds.
I saw infielders reach and grab
A certain hit with one great stab
And watched the ball go to first base
Where it was caught with skill and grace.
I’ve seen balls lost in the bright sun
And speedsters score the winning run.
But of all sad things that I recall
The one that hurts me most of all
Is that I’ve never caught a foul;
It keeps me up and makes me howl:
I’ve never caught a single ball!