1000 THINGS TO DO

There must be 1000 things to do
besides torturing myself in front of the TV
watching my team sink even lower in the standings.
Do the laundry
Am I such a glutton for punishment that
I serve jail time measured in long innings?
Write a novel
Will someone please rescue me from this
addiction which makes me stare at the tube
until the last batter finally strikes out.
Go for a 5K run
Why does my team purposely play
such bad ball which shortens my lifespan?
Wash the dishes, mop the floor
Can I tear myself from the TV screen and
become a volunteer for some worthwhile charity?
Read a good book
Face it – the one thing I have to do, loyalty personified,
is to be there for my very sad, sad team.
Please help me!