NATIONAL IDOL

Cody had finished the previous season on a very sour note.
His play was lackadaisical and many times he’d been the goat.
He had struck out with the bases loaded more than anyone remembered,
And he had been particularly lousy in the stretch run in September.
His fielding was quite suspect, his range for balls diminished.
He had dropped several easy popups and his arm was probably finished.
His batting average of two-twenty, he blamed on his myopia
And excuses for his other failings: he had a cornucopia.

Last year there were unsavory occurrences that Cody didn’t handle well.
In fact the team reporter described it as his personal season from hell.
He tested positive for steroids and was suspended for thirty games.
He asserted there were lab errors, but the league rejected his false claims.
He was arrested for marijuana use, punched a policeman in the snout,
And spent a night in jail until his lawyer bailed him out.
He was involved in a night club kerfuffle, reinjured his bad knee,
Was placed on the disabled list, and for weeks was absentee.
Cody abused his girlfriend after drinking one too many beers,
And to complicate the problem, he had a wife of fifteen years.
One day a loud mouth rode him hard from the right field bleacher,
He charged into the stands with a bat and by mistake he hit a preacher.

Now it was time for a new contract; his record far from spotless,
He had made a trite apology, which most considered thoughtless.
He sat down with the general manager and his season was reviewed,
But the man’s dour demeanor indicated it might not be great news.
He told him that the deal before him was their absolute final offer.
Cody needed a windfall to put money in his coffer.
The owner’s daughter was pregnant; she had blackmailed him not to tell,
And he needed to pay child support, alimony and attorney fees as well.
The GM pulled out the sealed contract and Cody had faint hope.
Our hero’s hands were shaking as he tore open the envelope.
But sadly as he read the words, his eyes filled with copious tears.
He would only get five million a season for the next eleven years.